The universal conspiracy to keep your baby wide awake!


Yeah, i’m goin’ conspiracy on this one.

Ever notice when you FINALLY get your baby to close their eyes, that all of a sudden, that clear path to their bed room is now blocked mysteriously by the baby swing you pulled close to yourself so you could eat your cheddar and bacon ranch dip and pretzels in between begging God and your baby to go the @!## to sleep and watching ” Locked up abroad” ??!?!? There may even be some big Ol’ salty tears involved. Yours of course, not his.

No? Just me then…

Or hows about when you finally get him or her to “sleep” ( be for serious, babies never really “sleep”; instead blink for hours at a time as they await the moment they can open their to poop, take a bath with their fave parent, smile and look you in the eyes as they poop, or pee.), when all of a sudden your mom calls to see how he’s doing, and you can tell her that he’s awake… Still…and again….:(

Or doesn’t it seem like the refridgerator just got 10 decibels louder…

Or you curse yourself because you finally tranquilized him with 5 cc’s of milk and you hold him in your arms and get ready to put him down with your big cheese eatin’ grin, only to look in horror as you realize that his baby bed is facing one way, and just so happens you’re holding him the other way, and that may as well hold him because to put him down means that you get to pick him back up in approximately 3 seconds so you can play that fun lil’ game of “am I blinking or sleeping daddy?!?!?”

Or you notice how when you finally get them to blink for a long period of time, you stand there and you watch them breath… And you even entertain the thought of walking over and poking them to wake them up…


In case you’re looking for ways to QUICKLY fall asleep right after your noisy lil’ bundle of joy does, check out my new book, Master Keys to Health and Vitality to learn simple ways to sleep like a rock!


Best Wishes,

Amir Campbell


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Профессиональный художник-декоратор Андрей Крайнов

Декорирование интерьеров, роспись стен, потолков, полов. Барельефы. Декорирование предметов интерьера. Декоративная штукатурка. Картины, портреты на заказ. Моб.: +7 903 642 70 70 (Белгород)

Im ashamed to die until i have won some victory for humanity.(Horace Mann)



Your Survival Guide for College

%d bloggers like this: